Have you clearly identified your family values?
Until you do, you are likely to use the wrong measurement for gauging how you’re doing as mom, and how well your kids are growing toward a meaningful life.
What is your measuring stick for these things?
Too often COMPARISON or PERFECTION sneaks in as mom's measuring stick for Mom Success.
An INTENTIONAL mom TAKES THE TIME TO DETERMINE HER TOP VALUES and then those VALUES SHAPE her decisions, actions, words, goals, schedule, and perspective.
Let’s talk about it today on episode 55 of the Practically Speaking MOM: Intentional Mom, Strong Family Podcast!
Click here to listen to Episode 55: Goodbye COMPARISON & PERFECTION, there's a BETTER WAY to MEASURE MOM SUCCESS!
It’s not wrong to evaluate how you're doing in motherhood. In fact, I find it beneficial IF I evaluate how I'm doing based on a pre-determined CLEAR target of what I'm aiming for in motherhood.
📌Stop COMPARING yourself to other moms and your kids to other kids.
📌Stop aiming for PERFECTION and holding off on happiness until you've achieved perfection.
📌Identify Your Family Values - I share mine in this episode #55
📌Determine HOW your Family Values are going to be incorporated into your life
- what words you use in correcting & guiding your kids' behavior
- in setting a VISION for who your family is becoming
- in scheduling activities for BONDING around these family values
- remembering your values in every DECISION
- evaluating your GOALS to see how they align with your values
-make time in your family SCHEDULE for those values ( for example, if you have a value of being a family who loves God, do you make time in your schedule to teach the kids how to study the Bible, worship together, memorize scripture... OR if you have a value of close family relationships, do you teach the children to repair and restore relationship when there's been conflict? Do you teach them healthy ways to conflict? Do you teach them that you're a TEAM?)
Parenting without having CLEARLY ESTABLISHED VALUES is like shooting arrows while blindfolded- you're not going to reach the target AND someone is likely to get hurt.
Taking off the blindfold allows your eyes to be fixed on the target.
Here's My Target:
That I and my family would have TRUE LIFE and that we would live life to the fullest.
In John 10:10, Jesus said, "I have come that you would have life and have it to the fullest."
For me," life to the fullest" is broken down into FOUR PARTS:
1. Aiming toward a Healthy Relationship with God for myself and each of my family members
2. Aiming toward Healthy Family Relationships
3. Aiming toward Healthy Character Qualities in myself and my children.
4. Aiming toward Healthy Lifestyle Habits – relationally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically.
Notice that I said “AIMING TOWARD” these values...I don’t say that success is having achieved these values because each of them is a continuum of growth. We don't ARRIVE at a healthy relationship with God and then we check it off the list. No, my relationship with God is valuable to me and it is a work in PROGRESS. I can be PROGRESSING TOWARD THE TARGET. I can be MOVING TOWARD the goal. Philippians 3:12 says, "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me."
So the questions I ask to measure how I'm doing with motherhood:
✅Have I set a clear target?
✅Am I moving in the right direction toward my value?
✅Do I see progress?
✅Am I pushing myself passed my comfort zone and truly growing?
Also in Episode 55, I spend the last ten minutes talking about the next step of My Journey Back to Health, specifically talking about Adrenal Fatigue and ways I'm working to heal my adrenals, including some practical steps for improvement.
Resources
Link to adrenal fatigue article
Link to next week's guest, Stephanie Fisher Instagram.com/StephFisherWellness
Here's a link to my favorite source of MCT Oil (as discussed in this episode). I buy several things from Trim Healthy Mama because I believe in the QUALITY of the ingredients and INTEGRITY of the company. Shopping through this link could provide a small financial benefit to me as I am an affiliate of Trim Healthy Mama. I am VERY choosy about what companies I choose to affiliate. I only affiliate with companies that I have used personally for an extended amount of time and have found it beneficial to my family, and thus, want to bring the same benefits to your family. If you would like to see my other affiliate recommendations, click here.
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