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Podcast & Blog: Unlock Your Child's Strengths & Impact their Self-Perception, Episode 63

Episode 63 focuses on two of our child's heart-questions, “Am I worth Knowing?” and “Am I worth Believing In?” It gives insight into how to DISCOVER your child's strengths that may be hiding behind "weaknesses" and also gives practical ways to impact your child's self-perception.

In this second week from my material, "Your Love Becomes Their Strength, Answering the Six Questions of Your Child's Heart" we join again with the Chosen Mamas Podcast, where I was asked to be a guest.

We will look at three common parent dilemmas:

1.What to do when our child’s weaknesses are covering up their strengths

2. What to do when our child doesn’t believe in themselves or is consumed by negative self-talk

3. How to identify my children’s strengths and get a game-plan for growth.


Yesterday, my youngest daughter, Emma, and I were reading together about SNAIL SHELLS. The science material was saying that a snail is like a slug wearing a cool-looking house on its back that goes its entire life without ever getting to see the most beautiful part of itself.

So a snail body is ugly and slimy, right? It’s definitely nothing exceptional. But then it’s got this beautifully-crafted-by-God one-of-a-kind ornament on its back – an ornament with multiple purposes. Besides aiding the snail in multiple ways, the shell also adds joy and brilliance to our world, and it points to a divine creator-God.

That got me thinking … snails are a lot like many kids (and even many of us adults) that only see the ordinary part of ourselves – maybe even see our ordinariness as unattractive and unwanted when all the while, we have wonderful, uniquely-designed-by-God qualities that we don’t see.

Can I share another sad reality and make it slightly uncomfortable for a second?

Here goes...

There are times that we moms only see the ugly-side of our kids and have trouble finding the beauty. At times, I’ll see the ugly, slimy part of my child and the slime trail they’re leaving behind wherever they go, while I am completely overlooking the tremendous gift of their creative mind or their compassionate heart or their attention to detail…

Intentional Mom, it’s our job to help our kids see their God-designed beauty.

Part of our role as intentional moms is to identify God’s unique design in our children, to help our child to see their unique, intentional-design, And – here’s another key part- help them to allow the Holy Spirit to HONE their gifts & strengths and work on their weaknesses that may be overshadowing those strengths,

You know, buff those strengths until they shine, sand off the sharp points and rough edges.

This process is the tremendous privilege we are given in motherhood of partnering with our kids and with God to develop their lives into their purpose.

Last week I introduced you to the Six Questions of your Child’s heart.

We talked about the question, “Am I worth Restoring?” Here's a link to episode 62: Mending Your Child's Heart at every age.

This week We answer the question, "Am I worth KNOWING" or "Do you really know me? Do I have purpose? Do I add any value to the world?" We learn to demonstrate the love answer, “I love you enough to discover who you are and discern what is happening on the inside.” It's about being excited about the life-long role you have as your child's parent, to discover all of their unique qualities and help your child to also see those qualities.

Be sure to listen to the podcast so you can hear how I refer to my child as a treasure box that God made, that is filled with all sorts of unique, one-of-a-kind attributes that the world needs. This same treasure box concept will also help you to talk to them about their "weaknesses."

Hint, Parents: Your child's weaknesses are usually your road map to their hidden strengths! For example if your child has an apparent weakness of being critical and nit-picky, your child probably has great attention to detail and is good at critically thinking through a plan ahead of time to make sure that all the possible pitfalls are identified and can be corrected before you implement the plan. So the strengths were there hiding behind their critical spirit. So... help them to see that about themselves - both the strength and the apparent "weakness." Really it's not a weakness; it's a strength that needs to be shaped, honed, sanding off the rough edges so the true talent can shine!

In this week's podcast episode 63, we hear more about this by going back to the Chosen Mamas Podcast that I introduced you to last week. The Chosen group had asked me to be a guest speaker at their event and then asked me to record a Q&A session with them on their podcast, Chosen Mamas.

Last week we listened to the first question from that recording time on the topic of Wounds & Restoration as we talked about our child’s heart question, “Am I worth Restoring?” So, if you didn’t get a chance to hear that, go back to episode 62.

Today as we listen to the Chosen Mamas podcast, first you’ll hear them ask about Believing in our child then it wraps up with a method I use to help me DISCOVER my child’s unique design.

This week the question is about knowing our child, identifying their unique qualities, and visionary parenting – painting a picture of hope and motivation for our kids as we answer their heart question, “Am I worth Knowing" & "Am I worth Believing In?” Let’s listen. In the School Room with Val:

At the beginning of today’s podcast, I told you that Emma and I were learning about snails. I wanted to take a quick minute and tell you about CrossWired Science. It’s an online Science center that helps your children fall in love with God’s amazing creation. It is not for just little kids, either, it has some very advanced science and I am not kidding it has been the most amazing material I’ve come across in my 23 years of homeschooling. It is very versatile and you could easily use this material no matter where your child attends school. OR it also has a full curriculum included with it if you want to benefit from all of it. The videos are exceptional quality and the content is like no other. Now the con is that it is pretty expensive, I think about $100 a year. I got it when they were doing an introductory special of only $20. I am not affiliated with it at all, but I wanted you to know it exists. I will also tell you, that the science curriculum I most recommend is by Jay Wile from his company Berean Builders OR I also like the elementary science curriculum by Apologia. But if you want science videos that are visually stunning, coupled with fantastic facts that point you to our creator, then check out CrossWired Science.

NEXT WEEK: There’s more I want to tell you about Knowing Your Child. Next week I’m going to share with you some resources to help you discover their design AND I’ll also give you questions to go through to help you DISCOVER their one-of-a-kind design and questions to help you discern what’s going on inside of them. So come back next week for part two of the question, “Am I worth Knowing?”

My Intentional Mom Friend, Your family is God’s masterpiece. He designed the incomparable combination of your little tribe. It’s an honor to meet with you every week to equip and encourage you in your worthy journey of being mama to your masterpiece.

If this podcast is a blessing to you, won’t you please take the time to share it with moms that you know?

At the bottom of this blog post, there's a spot to enter your email to subscribe to my weekly email containing a blog post & podcast.

💚RESOURCES related to this week's podcast

💚Chosen Mamas Podcast is associated with CHOSEN, located in Derby, KS, a group for moms of all ages who want to intersect their faith in Jesus with the every day ups and downs of motherhood. They’re at South Rock Christian Church or email me at and I’ll connect you with Liz or Amanda. They are two of the moms you’ll hear on this podcast over the next two weeks.



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