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Fatherhood & Your Child: hope, help, and honor. Podcast Episode 42

Every child longs for a loving father.

Every child has a perfect Heavenly Father, and either an imperfect or absent earthly father.

On today's podcast, we'll be talking about all of that - the harmful father, the absent father, the imperfect but loving father, and your child's Heavenly Daddy. This is an episode of honor and hope as well as some inspiration for marriage and some role modeling of fatherhood, too. Even the good dads aren't perfect, but those imperfect loving dads are probably accomplishing more than you might think!

No matter what kind of father is in your child's life, even if they have no father at all, your child has a faithful, perfect, loving Heavenly Daddy.

We'll take a brief look at three types of fathers:

⬜The Harming Father

⬜The Absent Father

⬜The Loving, Imperfect Father

And you'll be reminded that no matter what kind of father your child has experienced, they have a loving, Heavenly Daddy who is always with them! This episode also includes lots of good characteristics of a loving but imperfect father.

Special Thanks, this week, to four dear mamas who were kind enough to share some wisdom. They each had an absent or harming father experience, and I asked them if they could give me words of wisdom to pass along to all of you, our Intentional Mom community. We have moms in all kinds of circumstances, including moms who are raising their children alone. This is a message of hope for you as well as some practical steps to take if your children don't have a loving father in their life.

But that's just a portion of today's special edition episode! You'll hear from all seven of my children as they recorded some surprise messages. Each shares from their heart about what mattered most in their life regarding their dad, my husband, Rich. This entire episode was a surprise to my husband, Rich, as he is the editor and publisher of the podcast each week. Sneaking in an episode without him was a lot of fun for me and the kids Join in our little surprise, won't you! It even ends with a short tribute song to their dad, sung by our three youngest children.

An authentic podcast led by God

Each week I desperately seek God's heart for how He wants HIS podcast to go - what He wants me to say, what resources He wants me to bring to you. And I seek, through all of it, to be as real and authentic as possible. Sometimes, God tells me to change the plan and that's what happened this week!

God interrupted our scheduled podcast to add in THIS SPECIAL EDITION episode about FATHERHOOD! It includes a tribute to my husband, Rich, from our kids. (Update: The very cool part of this story is that God knew that Rich's mom was going to pass away this week and that Rich would need the week off from everything in life so he could travel to go be with his dad and make arrangements. God had impressed on me to make this surprise podcast in honor of Rich,, making it without him so that this week he would have the week off from producing a podcast because he thought he was working on this weeks when he actually was working on the following week's episode. God is so awesome to orchestrate this break for him. I am in awe. That being said, please pray for Rich, his dad, and siblings this week).

We were all ready to publish the first week of a mini-series on Stress for Moms & Kids (coming soon!) In this three-week series, I'm joined by Marriage and Family Therapist, Amanda Colliatie. This is the second time she's been on our podcast. The first time Amanda was on the Practically Speaking MOM podcast, my episode with her became one of our most popular, so I'm totally anticipating bringing this next mini-series to all of you! Click here to listen to the earlier episode where we had Amanda on the podcast, episode 13, Mom's Mental Health, Our Drive for Perfection, Joy in the Valley - Val interviews Marriage & Family Therapist Amanda Colliatie with a LIVE studio audience. Amanda and I had a great time recording the upcoming mini-series about different types of stress and how we can create some buffers in our life to deal with stress for both moms and kids. It will now publish July 2020!)

You've met Rich on the show several times. He edits and produces the Practically Speaking MOM podcast and often will come on to give an intro, segue, or conclusion. AND, our episodes on marriage, where Rich and I present together, are among our most popular with our listeners.

Here's some of the marriage episodes that we have led together:

Episode 17: Goal Setting for Kids. Plus, Dreaming & Goal-Setting in Marriage

Episode 8: Intentional Marriage: Val & Rich on Redeeming Your Marriage

Rich is the Quiet Difference-Maker, the gentle hero of our family. He leads by serving, and that's the best kind leader of all!

Rich with our three sons and two sons-in-law


A Wife's Prayer for God to Continue the Miracle in Marriage

Rich and I will be the first to tell you that our marriage hasn't been perfect, but we were committed to identifying the problems and fixing them with God's help. We are so thankful that God mended our mess!

There are a lot of things about marriage that I believe are absolute miracles! One of those marriage miracles that I mention on this episode is that God helps Rich see my best and my potential rather than just all the many flaws. I mention this miracle in the prayer below as well.

Here is the prayer that I shared on this podcast episode. It may sound like a selfish prayer because it is about our marriage, but it's not selfish to pray about your marriage! Instead, this represents that

1. God is our source for a healthy marriage, so it is Him we should run to for everything about our marriage.

2. :Marriage deserves and requires our attention and effort and time. Prayer is the place to start for improving our marriage - give time and effort to praying for your marriage.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for this gift, a man to call mine. To walk beside me, to need me, to bless me.

I don’t know what you had in mind when you brought this man into my life, because

I’m flawed, Lord, in both character and appearance. That’s what I see, but he helps me to see something else. Something other. I can only fathom that you, Lord, are the One who shows him this other view of me.

Thank you, God, for giving him eyes that see my beauty when I can’t seem to find it.

Thank you for giving him arms that hold me close when the world is pulling me apart.

Thank you for giving him words that transfers strength directly from his lips to my spirit.

Please keep his heart always connected to mine.

Continue the miracle, Lord. Continue the miracle.


A few more pics of the imperfect, loving dad that lives at our house (and then the RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS PODCAST EPISODE are at the end of this blog post).

We bought a house that needed pretty much everything remodeled. In this picture, we had already finished the kitchen except the tile floor, which he was prepping to remove.He works hard to give us a nice home.

Rich, Abby, Emma in Lake Michigan

Rich with our grandson James

Resources Mentioned in this episode

Focus on the Family Help line - 1-855-771-HELP (4357)

Andrew Peterson's music and products:



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